在自己生病的时候才懂得自己的脆弱
偏偏在这个脆弱的时刻
只想回家
想说要尽快完成这里的功课
赶快、期待星期四的到来
回家去 =)
21.11.11
21.7.11
Keep going on
Busy till I don’t even have time to really think of what had happened for the end of the day. For the time I free, my mind still thinking on '”what else I have not do?” “what else I need to do?” and “what else is still waiting for me to do?” It’s like everyday my mind cant really stop thinking on this aside sleeping. I don’t really have time to take good rest, and too many things to worry and take care of. Things are always gone uncontrolled and overload. But still I need to overcome all this by myself. I do understand sometimes we are just helpless. I mean maybe lack of luck. Maybe we are not putting enough efforts. Or maybe we should do more things to change whatever we want to change. Or maybe just wait, to wait for certain important moment, to be changed.
Many people said I am so busy body. Yes I am. But still I have time to sleep, time to enjoy, and time to do things that I like to do. I just enjoy whatever I do now, it’s just that simple yet hardly to understand. =)
有些是并不是想象中那么差，还在努力的学习着反方向思考 
12.7.11
Nothing to be disgraced
I don’t really understand how she had gone through all these. I tried to understand as a daughter. You would not know how these feeling was until you heard your mum said:”I really think of what will happen to this family if I was gone.” How important she was in the family? I cant really answer. Pretty important? Extremely important? I would not say I cant live without her, but I do feel very very bad and damn hurt even she just say that to me and I imagined a world without her for more than few seconds.
And now things turned out badly after the surgery. She might need to do another one. I just felt angry about that, irresponsible doctor, careless, or whatever bullshit hangover effect~!!!! Seeing how strong and tough she still can be, I just don’t know what else can I do as a daughter. I don’t really understand what she felt, even I know how irritated she was, as much as I can feel and experience now, but I just cant do anything to reduce her irritation thoughts and worries. Even I have tears rolling inside my eyes when she talking with me, I still cant let her see my weaknesses and worried, as she might cry alone at night when I was not there too.
Useless huh? I just always the one who have minor contributions in the family and even I am the one knowing the most and studied until the highest level in the family. What bullshit I have studied and cant even help my own family?Sorry if I did disappointed you all, and I am really not that good enough.
Now is a critical period we must gone through together. I know there is nothing much I could do now but at least I have steps for it. Solving problems one by one as usual. Life is full with challenges and barriers right? We just can walk through it with smile =)
*pray that everything is going alright* (I don’t really have faith for anything else aside myself, but when things come to helplessness, we cant not to change our mind and look for some beliefs to lay on.)
One thing that I still feel grateful and thankful that I still have friends that always give useful advises and necessary support for me when I need it. Thanks for everything friends =)
26.1.11
With a little too much
Not sure why am I putting this title. Just felt to. My day is just too little but sometimes too much for something. Isn’t that we always do that? Spend too much time on useless things but spend only a little bit time on something which take time. Human being. A little too much to understand. I don’t like to take responsible on something that I cant do. But if I were involving in something, I will try all my best to do it and do it as perfect as it could be. This is why I don’t understand people who want so much to get into something, but do not want to do it properly or even sometimes give me a “I-am-not-responsible-to-this” or “There-must-be-someone-will-do-it” look~ I seriously don’t like people who take everything granted. “Too much” for me, I think even “too much” for the people who work with you. Too much irresponsible, too much fake, too much bad words can come from my mouth.
Alright, finish my grumbling. Get back to something pleasant me. Will go back to Ipoh on Thursday. Yes it’s this Thursday~! Seriously I love everything about this CNY season. The smile on people, the new clothes on people, the ang pau, the biscuits, even the song. Hope to get back as soon as possible, I just miss home so much~!
Oh there is a reminder for me in my blog. A reminder for our 5S1 commitment after five years. Isn’t the date is so nice? 1010~ Guys meet you all soon ^^
一点一滴，这些累积就是生活……
♥ 平水相逢的总是太多，知心的总是太少。
♥ 当我们成长到一定的年纪，看的东西越多，越觉得有些东西不算什么
♥ 看在角度的份上，我尝试去原谅别人。
♥ 当沉默时，总是想很多，但大多数都可能在发呆。
♥ 其实伪装真的很辛苦，不如放下面具，做回自己。
♥ 学会坦然，要知道这世界不会因为你的不开心而停止转动。
~~jill~~
17.1.11
Hard earn money
Through friends, I received a job on doing business assignment which is being rejected by business student and even said it is terribly hard. As a psychology student, I thought it was easy, but in fact it wasn’t. I regret. Till the time I turn it down. I think I am just over-estimate myself in doing things that I have not do before, and even not belongs to me.
What I was saying is I am just not a business student, and luckily I did not take business or business psychology. To do things that I do not like is suffered. I would like to work towards the money, but somehow the inner side will keep on argue that “is that worth to?” or “why am I doing things that I does not like?”.
But that is life and it is always true that we have to do things that we do not like and still we have to learn to survive in this reality. Somehow there are always choices to make my stands shaking. And this is true that when I come across choices, I will doubt and can’t really make a decision, in case I forced to make one. I hate myself suffering in dilemma, to do or not to do, to earn or not to earn. Of course we will always think on a positive side. In fact, making a decision to give up on something you are working on was not easy. Imagine I have spend so much time on it and even force myself to read something that I am not suppose to read. Fed up. Just screw the business assignment. Screw the Singapore institute. Screw the Rm100!
I was always wonder why there were people willing to do something that they do not like. Now I get to know some of the reason. Life made us to do it. I would do something that I like if I have enough of money. I would spend my time to do something benefit to the society if I have enough of time. If only if. If there is really ‘'if’’ exist in reality, there would not be so much troubles and problems happened in life.
But with the existence of ‘if’, we learned. Learned from the past, practice your present, to prepare for your future.
24.11.10
Terrified
Is being tortured by assignment and coming socio final exam...
Just feel over stress recently whenever assignments come...
What the hell I am doing?
Seriously no idea...
And suppose I have no time to blog but just feel-to-blog to make me relax and happier...
and also felt guilty whenever my evil,devil or whatever my bad housemate asking me to play with them
I just cant control myself...
Oh my god...~!!!
I was just too hate myself and actually the evil was in me, not them
and hell knows i have no idea how the past i have gone through
no matter how hard
I have been gone through
Optimistically view
It's actually the same
even though sometimes we feel that is not same
but the process actually the same and started over and over again~
Assignment/tests--scare and cant sleep and do til midnite--finally pass up on time and pray hard for grades--pass
it still will come to an end
it just maybe the result or outcome will not be the same
Perhaps at this moment
I told myself
It should be done!
and before that I should take enough sleep first...
Nite =)
Just feel over stress recently whenever assignments come...
What the hell I am doing?
Seriously no idea...
And suppose I have no time to blog but just feel-to-blog to make me relax and happier...
and also felt guilty whenever my evil,devil or whatever my bad housemate asking me to play with them
I just cant control myself...
Oh my god...~!!!
I was just too hate myself and actually the evil was in me, not them
and hell knows i have no idea how the past i have gone through
no matter how hard
I have been gone through
Optimistically view
It's actually the same
even though sometimes we feel that is not same
but the process actually the same and started over and over again~
Assignment/tests--scare and cant sleep and do til midnite--finally pass up on time and pray hard for grades--pass
it still will come to an end
it just maybe the result or outcome will not be the same
Perhaps at this moment
I told myself
It should be done!
and before that I should take enough sleep first...
Nite =)
10.9.10
脆弱的倔强
不肯低头我死都不低头
你要我什么都可以就是不能给你我的尊严
生活虽然艰苦但我有骨气
不需说什么我并不需要同情可怜是朋友的话一句：“我‘十扑’你！”什么都够了
是没错
我正在精神崩溃当中就连肉体也慢慢陷入无法形容状态
行尸走肉用这个词来形容自己
一点都没有错
我懂我无法做些什么
只想发泄
管我发牢骚、发噏风
什么都好
就让自己就这么的不理智一天
幼稚一天
意志消沉一天
累了
哭了
只剩下自己
不想让别人看到自己懦弱的一面
尤其是她
不会让她担心了
我告诉自己
就是这么的脆弱
但也依然倔强
你管我跌倒站不稳就是不要你扶
站在旁边给我加油就行了
就当我是在学习走路的孩子吧
放手让我自己去尝试跌倒然后自己爬起来
伤口还是我自己的
这些都是我自己倔强拿来的的痕迹却让我警惕自己要靠自己不然没人能帮到你
求人不如求自己
自己选择的路，
别说跪着、爬着
无论如何都要走到终点。
4.5.10
Reminder
Went back to KL yesterday for several purposes....
The major one, have an appointment with Mr.Kenneth for financial assistance....
The minor one, get the approval for streamyx unipack and register for degree....
Though, I get to meet many friends around the corridor so...
It's really good to see them...
Going on with their life...
Continue study and work hard to fight for their life...
Today,I met with the acting head of department of psychology.
He reminds me a lot when during the interview....
He asked:"Why you can get a pretty good results in SPM but why have such a drop for your foundation?"
I'm doubting at the moment....
I know I was doing badly....
Because everyone else during the foundation considered it as a honeymoon....
I worked hard and have a different thinking during the 1st sem....
But maybe I'm an easily-get-influenced person....
So I've change in 2nd semester onwards....
Regretting is not doing best in this moment....
What I have to do is cheer up and work hard and fight for the coming degree....
He actually also reminded me a lot for the promises I made for the first day I came to KL.
A serious promise had help me spiritually during my first semester...
But obviously the promise failed because I get something else to replace this in my spirit.....
Maybe I am the only one who cares about the results....
I know myself well and should know I could do better than what I have now....
Hard work and fortune sometimes is work together....
We need to work hard first before waiting for the fortune to look for us....
No matter what it is...
We have to stay strong to face any barriers in the future =)
The major one, have an appointment with Mr.Kenneth for financial assistance....
The minor one, get the approval for streamyx unipack and register for degree....
Though, I get to meet many friends around the corridor so...
It's really good to see them...
Going on with their life...
Continue study and work hard to fight for their life...
Today,I met with the acting head of department of psychology.
He reminds me a lot when during the interview....
He asked:"Why you can get a pretty good results in SPM but why have such a drop for your foundation?"
I'm doubting at the moment....
I know I was doing badly....
Because everyone else during the foundation considered it as a honeymoon....
I worked hard and have a different thinking during the 1st sem....
But maybe I'm an easily-get-influenced person....
So I've change in 2nd semester onwards....
Regretting is not doing best in this moment....
What I have to do is cheer up and work hard and fight for the coming degree....
He actually also reminded me a lot for the promises I made for the first day I came to KL.
A serious promise had help me spiritually during my first semester...
But obviously the promise failed because I get something else to replace this in my spirit.....
Maybe I am the only one who cares about the results....
I know myself well and should know I could do better than what I have now....
Hard work and fortune sometimes is work together....
We need to work hard first before waiting for the fortune to look for us....
No matter what it is...
We have to stay strong to face any barriers in the future =)
18.4.10
一个人的一天
这安静的星期天……
如果我身在怡保……
早上一定如常地和妈妈吃早餐……
然后回家看戏，睡我的午觉……
睡醒就叫肚子饿……
叫妈妈打包什么都好……
等到晚上……
再和阿姨们出去吃……
吃完就去逛逛街……
我这美好的星期天……
落在KL就不同了……
呆在家睡到中午……
吃brunch……
上上网……
躺着看戏……
什么都不能做了……
因为没有车……
出街也变得懒了……
去哪里都依靠别人……
这种感觉……
不好受……
习惯性的……
什么都不说……
想约人出街……
但原来只有自己是这么的得空……
真的很不习惯寂寞……
一个人的世界……
真的不知道那些深山的孤独老人怎么过活……
突然对着城市感到陌生……
宁静的夜晚……
从16楼楼台望出去……
看着大城市的夜景……
是很美……
但是和家乡的绿叶比起来……
我还是比较喜欢吹着那丝丝青草味的清风……
享受宁静……
很希望明天一早的到来……
快点结束眼前的烦恼……
回乡去……
=)
如果我身在怡保……
早上一定如常地和妈妈吃早餐……
然后回家看戏，睡我的午觉……
睡醒就叫肚子饿……
叫妈妈打包什么都好……
等到晚上……
再和阿姨们出去吃……
吃完就去逛逛街……
我这美好的星期天……
落在KL就不同了……
呆在家睡到中午……
吃brunch……
上上网……
躺着看戏……
什么都不能做了……
因为没有车……
出街也变得懒了……
去哪里都依靠别人……
这种感觉……
不好受……
习惯性的……
什么都不说……
想约人出街……
但原来只有自己是这么的得空……
真的很不习惯寂寞……
一个人的世界……
真的不知道那些深山的孤独老人怎么过活……
突然对着城市感到陌生……
宁静的夜晚……
从16楼楼台望出去……
看着大城市的夜景……
是很美……
但是和家乡的绿叶比起来……
我还是比较喜欢吹着那丝丝青草味的清风……
享受宁静……
很希望明天一早的到来……
快点结束眼前的烦恼……
回乡去……
=)
4.4.10
Be punctual
Think to save money for this month....
For last week I back to Ipoh....
I already waste one train ticket...
but now I'm wasting one again....
Really speechless....
The train just gone in front of my eye for the ever first time in my life....
We just late for bout 1 minute....
Ok...so I cant blame the Malaysia transport system be so punctual today???
My fault lo~
Like what my brother said....
"You will be used to it...."
Maybe....I will be used to it....
Rushing for the train was not the first time....
Last time I was so lucky...
But today....
just not my day....
Dunno what to say.....
I back late and I skip classes....
It ok for me but not used to it really...
It was a funny experince for me and I act like an idiot....
---------------------------------------------------------
Though I was a stupid....
I had a really happy weekend with my family....
Paying respect to our ancestors...
Included HIM....
We are really good children
and I see mum's smile when everyone of us around her....
I could feel the happiness from her smile....
I know it even we just having a simple and small dinner...
but we are all sitting together and have fun....
I know I was late for the train...
But they wait me and end up with jokes....
I smile again from disappointment...
That's what a family is....
The family for me...
Maybe I din get luck to get into the train....
But I get the luck to have such family like this...=)
For last week I back to Ipoh....
I already waste one train ticket...
but now I'm wasting one again....
Really speechless....
The train just gone in front of my eye for the ever first time in my life....
We just late for bout 1 minute....
Ok...so I cant blame the Malaysia transport system be so punctual today???
My fault lo~
Like what my brother said....
"You will be used to it...."
Maybe....I will be used to it....
Rushing for the train was not the first time....
Last time I was so lucky...
But today....
just not my day....
Dunno what to say.....
I back late and I skip classes....
It ok for me but not used to it really...
It was a funny experince for me and I act like an idiot....
---------------------------------------------------------
Though I was a stupid....
I had a really happy weekend with my family....
Paying respect to our ancestors...
Included HIM....
We are really good children
and I see mum's smile when everyone of us around her....
I could feel the happiness from her smile....
I know it even we just having a simple and small dinner...
but we are all sitting together and have fun....
I know I was late for the train...
But they wait me and end up with jokes....
I smile again from disappointment...
That's what a family is....
The family for me...
Maybe I din get luck to get into the train....
But I get the luck to have such family like this...=)
23.3.10
人生的‘难免’
终于遇到了艰难……
这是预料中的事……
打从自己做决定的开始……
我就知道这条路不会那么的平坦……
这是无可避免的……
有哪一条路是没有任何绊脚石的？……
我很累……
我很懊恼……
但我有恒心……
我试着去面对与完成自己所坚持的东西……
我会胆怯……
我会害怕……
但是我会勇敢的接收困难……
人生有太多太多在所难免的事了……
我们都无法预料事情突然的发生……
预料不了，更阻止不了……
我们或许能够坚持……
但是到了真的真的不能的时候……
事情就变得‘在所难免’……
我们就算无法接受，也得接受……
＝＝抱着希望，怀着梦想＝＝
这是预料中的事……
打从自己做决定的开始……
我就知道这条路不会那么的平坦……
这是无可避免的……
有哪一条路是没有任何绊脚石的？……
我很累……
我很懊恼……
但我有恒心……
我试着去面对与完成自己所坚持的东西……
我会胆怯……
我会害怕……
但是我会勇敢的接收困难……
人生有太多太多在所难免的事了……
我们都无法预料事情突然的发生……
预料不了，更阻止不了……
我们或许能够坚持……
但是到了真的真的不能的时候……
事情就变得‘在所难免’……
我们就算无法接受，也得接受……
＝＝抱着希望，怀着梦想＝＝
4.11.09
Just too busy
Felt so sorry to my blog as din post anything few days ago....
It is because I'm just too busy after I back to Ipoh last week.....
I've left out my assignments behind
and hang out with my friends for few days when I was in Ipoh...
Enjoyed really enjoyed....
but what is left is those busy life for rushing assignments......
I just done my research paper on Advanced English....
Haiz....but actually....
I have no idea what I'm talking about in literature reviews.....
Hope Ms. Chandra will be soft-hearted when penalize it......
Still have many things to go on....
I still have one reflective writing(Psychology assignments)
and one agurmentative essay(Advanced English assignments)
both also need to pass up due next week....
What is more......
Next week having quizzes also.....
I REALLY DONT KNOW WHY THEY SET IT LIKE AN EXAM PAPER
WANT US SIT THE QUIZ PAPER AT WISMA HELP
AND THE TIME IS NOT REASONABLE(5.30-6.30PM)
IMAGINE THAT MY CLASSES ENDED ON 11AM.....
WHAT TO DO FOR THE REST OF 6 HOURS??????
Really feel angry after I have viewed the announcement in my mailbox....
Again,presentation.....
There will be a total 2 presentation on the same day....
Hope I can do as well as I can....
This week gonna going back to Ipoh also.....
For the birthday girl Meiyan~
As she invited me so intentionally....
I must give some ''face''de~xp
It would be a happy weekend I think....^^
It is because I'm just too busy after I back to Ipoh last week.....
I've left out my assignments behind
and hang out with my friends for few days when I was in Ipoh...
Enjoyed really enjoyed....
but what is left is those busy life for rushing assignments......
I just done my research paper on Advanced English....
Haiz....but actually....
I have no idea what I'm talking about in literature reviews.....
Hope Ms. Chandra will be soft-hearted when penalize it......
Still have many things to go on....
I still have one reflective writing(Psychology assignments)
and one agurmentative essay(Advanced English assignments)
both also need to pass up due next week....
What is more......
Next week having quizzes also.....
I REALLY DONT KNOW WHY THEY SET IT LIKE AN EXAM PAPER
WANT US SIT THE QUIZ PAPER AT WISMA HELP
AND THE TIME IS NOT REASONABLE(5.30-6.30PM)
IMAGINE THAT MY CLASSES ENDED ON 11AM.....
WHAT TO DO FOR THE REST OF 6 HOURS??????
Really feel angry after I have viewed the announcement in my mailbox....
Again,presentation.....
There will be a total 2 presentation on the same day....
Hope I can do as well as I can....
This week gonna going back to Ipoh also.....
For the birthday girl Meiyan~
As she invited me so intentionally....
I must give some ''face''de~xp
It would be a happy weekend I think....^^
11.10.09
The dark period[I've to be stronger...]
A tired day for me again...
Back to ipoh just like drag me to hell....
I admit I was so bad luck that until today I'm still drop in darkness...
Back to today story....
waiting the 2.25pm train back to KL....
I went earlier to avoid the traffic jam problem...
Finally the train came...
Many people went on the train....
So me too...[I guess I can have a sleep 1st....]
Who knows a blue shirt guy said
"Train ke KL sudah.......(I din heard that clearly...) sila turun dan tunggu bus yang akan pergi ke KL central...."
I was like..."Huh?What the hell was going on?"(just walked down and see what happen~)
Everyone was waiting outside and two bus coming one few minutes later...
I met Leeyee's sister....
And we just stand together to wait for the bus....
the two bus were not for us....(there are some others going to tanjung malim and kampar...)
So we waited for the another one...
A beautiful cuti bus was drop by....
But we dont managed to get inside as too many people there already....
Planning to wait for the next one....
Who knows we have to wait half an hour somemore...[damn!]
We waited again.....
About 30 minutes later....
A bus really stopped outside and everyone rushed towards....
of course everyone was so worry because WE ALREADY DELAYED 2HOURS!!!!
I sat with Leeyee's sister so I can get into the bus....
Once again I guess I can have a sleep now......
Siapa tau few minutes later.....
The blue shirt guy called us down and go to the SCHOOL BUS!!!!!!!!!!!
@.@ we was like wan to shout out loud!!!!!!
Haiz....
The school bus was not that comfortable....
Shake and shake and shake until my bone want to separate edi.....=.=
Finally....
My bone pain but I'm still alive >.<
Reached KL central at 7+pm.....
Full with angryness.....
I din take dinner and back home straight away....
When the bad luck will gone?
Hope tmr will be a brand new day with brightness....
I will be stronger....
GOOD LUCK FOR THURSDAY PRESENTATION!
Back to ipoh just like drag me to hell....
I admit I was so bad luck that until today I'm still drop in darkness...
Back to today story....
waiting the 2.25pm train back to KL....
I went earlier to avoid the traffic jam problem...
Finally the train came...
Many people went on the train....
So me too...[I guess I can have a sleep 1st....]
Who knows a blue shirt guy said
"Train ke KL sudah.......(I din heard that clearly...) sila turun dan tunggu bus yang akan pergi ke KL central...."
I was like..."Huh?What the hell was going on?"(just walked down and see what happen~)
Everyone was waiting outside and two bus coming one few minutes later...
I met Leeyee's sister....
And we just stand together to wait for the bus....
the two bus were not for us....(there are some others going to tanjung malim and kampar...)
So we waited for the another one...
A beautiful cuti bus was drop by....
But we dont managed to get inside as too many people there already....
Planning to wait for the next one....
Who knows we have to wait half an hour somemore...[damn!]
We waited again.....
About 30 minutes later....
A bus really stopped outside and everyone rushed towards....
of course everyone was so worry because WE ALREADY DELAYED 2HOURS!!!!
I sat with Leeyee's sister so I can get into the bus....
Once again I guess I can have a sleep now......
Siapa tau few minutes later.....
The blue shirt guy called us down and go to the SCHOOL BUS!!!!!!!!!!!
@.@ we was like wan to shout out loud!!!!!!
Haiz....
The school bus was not that comfortable....
Shake and shake and shake until my bone want to separate edi.....=.=
Finally....
My bone pain but I'm still alive >.<
Reached KL central at 7+pm.....
Full with angryness.....
I din take dinner and back home straight away....
When the bad luck will gone?
Hope tmr will be a brand new day with brightness....
I will be stronger....
GOOD LUCK FOR THURSDAY PRESENTATION!
5.10.09
Busy days
So so so many assignments have given within 2 weeks....
Next week going to have 2 presentations in a day if I'm not wrong....
An outline have to pass up on Monday.
And the disaster will come on 20th this month...
How I'm going to face all these?
Only 4 subjects....
It is enough to kill me....
Many many many terms and definitions I need to momorize...
Especially psychology and CTS....
I dont know what it gonna to be in mid-term....
Maybe what I can do now is just study....[if I have time...]
Relax....
Make a promise for myself
"I HAVE TO SLEEP BEFORE 12 EVERYDAY!"
But this promise I have made last month....
Apparently,I failed...
Hope I can have a normal life LIKE A HUMAN~
[not a psycho at night,a vampire another morning~]
My panda eyes....=.=
Next week going to have 2 presentations in a day if I'm not wrong....
An outline have to pass up on Monday.
And the disaster will come on 20th this month...
How I'm going to face all these?
Only 4 subjects....
It is enough to kill me....
Many many many terms and definitions I need to momorize...
Especially psychology and CTS....
I dont know what it gonna to be in mid-term....
Maybe what I can do now is just study....[if I have time...]
Relax....
Make a promise for myself
"I HAVE TO SLEEP BEFORE 12 EVERYDAY!"
But this promise I have made last month....
Apparently,I failed...
Hope I can have a normal life LIKE A HUMAN~
[not a psycho at night,a vampire another morning~]
My panda eyes....=.=
9.8.09
白痴
我讲了我生平最蠢的大话……
也是最好笑的笑话……
不知道好笑还是好哭……
被烦了几天……
真的很烦……
不要再烦我好不好？
很白痴……
很愚蠢……
很无聊……
虽然做法狠了点……
但是这是得到解脱的最好方法……
对于不喜欢的东西……
我是绝对不会留手的……
一点机会我都不想给……
请原谅我是如此的绝情……
因为我从来都没有同情心……
无话可说……
原谅我写得这么抽象……
因为不想提起……
只想写下……
让自己记得自己做了这么劲的事……[哈哈~冷笑。。。]
p/s：终于写华语了……昨天被朋友说写太多英文了……害到他们没心看我的blog~=.=''' 写回华语咯~
明天就是死期……
希望不会死得这么难看……
也是最好笑的笑话……
不知道好笑还是好哭……
被烦了几天……
真的很烦……
不要再烦我好不好？
很白痴……
很愚蠢……
很无聊……
虽然做法狠了点……
但是这是得到解脱的最好方法……
对于不喜欢的东西……
我是绝对不会留手的……
一点机会我都不想给……
请原谅我是如此的绝情……
因为我从来都没有同情心……
无话可说……
原谅我写得这么抽象……
因为不想提起……
只想写下……
让自己记得自己做了这么劲的事……[哈哈~冷笑。。。]
p/s：终于写华语了……昨天被朋友说写太多英文了……害到他们没心看我的blog~=.=''' 写回华语咯~
明天就是死期……
希望不会死得这么难看……
28.7.09
Should I?
Haiz...
I have promise myself that cant back hometown before I finish my final exam....
But.....
Somethings make me feel wanna back....
Firstly...
My brother who just get his job at SG will come back this weekend too....
He told me to back so and said will belanja me eat dim sum~
Wooo....
He belanja wor~~~
Is tat a reason for me to back?
Another reason is....
I'm sick badly....
Need my mum professional cares
so I can recover faster....
Hahahaha~
And the last reason which is the most important reason
That is my brain keep on telling me.....
Back la back la back la~~~
Oppssss...Is tat good to back?
It is tired always during the journey KL-Ipoh-KL 'ing'
No idea ar!!!
Assignments haven done....
Presentation haven done....
Revision also haven begin...and don knw start from where???
Everyone is hardworking now but my brain is in damage and cant works now....
Who can help me instead?
Take care myself la~
Luckily tml can rest at home all the day....
Viruses plz go away~~~
I have promise myself that cant back hometown before I finish my final exam....
But.....
Somethings make me feel wanna back....
Firstly...
My brother who just get his job at SG will come back this weekend too....
He told me to back so and said will belanja me eat dim sum~
Wooo....
He belanja wor~~~
Is tat a reason for me to back?
Another reason is....
I'm sick badly....
Need my mum professional cares
so I can recover faster....
Hahahaha~
And the last reason which is the most important reason
That is my brain keep on telling me.....
Back la back la back la~~~
Oppssss...Is tat good to back?
It is tired always during the journey KL-Ipoh-KL 'ing'
No idea ar!!!
Assignments haven done....
Presentation haven done....
Revision also haven begin...and don knw start from where???
Everyone is hardworking now but my brain is in damage and cant works now....
Who can help me instead?
Take care myself la~
Luckily tml can rest at home all the day....
Viruses plz go away~~~
30.3.09
我是个超级无敌大笨蛋！！！
很久没试过这么沮丧了……
学车学不好……
是我自己太笨了……
今早出门时妈妈还叮嘱要俾心机学好来……
结果今天的结果是令她失望的……
连车叔也好像对我有些不耐烦……
当我做不到时，他更有些失望……
对不起啊~
我实在是太笨了……
学来学去都会做错……
下个礼拜就要pre-test了……
如果再做不好我真的很对不起他们……
我一定要加油！
也一定会努力！
我不会放弃的！
笨蛋是有毅力的！
学车学不好……
是我自己太笨了……
今早出门时妈妈还叮嘱要俾心机学好来……
结果今天的结果是令她失望的……
连车叔也好像对我有些不耐烦……
当我做不到时，他更有些失望……
对不起啊~
我实在是太笨了……
学来学去都会做错……
下个礼拜就要pre-test了……
如果再做不好我真的很对不起他们……
我一定要加油！
也一定会努力！
我不会放弃的！
笨蛋是有毅力的！
9.2.09
放弃了……
我真的‘ong居居’的等了三天……
结果一通电话都没有咯……
彻底的失望了……
又一份工石沉海底……
算了算了…………
妈妈叫我找其他的啦~
而哥哥和阿姨就说我：“做么做啦~剩番两三个月休仲好啦~”
我不希望随随便便找些自己不喜欢的工作……
但又不想在家里当废材……
很矛盾啊~
唔知道自己想点……
每一天都要费尽脑力来想自己今天要做什么……
看书、、打机、上网、找东西吃、看戏、还有睡觉[虽然每天迟迟不能睡……]
每天就重复做这些……
我只能做的只有这些……
唉~
不说了……
继续打机……sienz ing~
结果一通电话都没有咯……
彻底的失望了……
又一份工石沉海底……
算了算了…………
妈妈叫我找其他的啦~
而哥哥和阿姨就说我：“做么做啦~剩番两三个月休仲好啦~”
我不希望随随便便找些自己不喜欢的工作……
但又不想在家里当废材……
很矛盾啊~
唔知道自己想点……
每一天都要费尽脑力来想自己今天要做什么……
看书、、打机、上网、找东西吃、看戏、还有睡觉[虽然每天迟迟不能睡……]
每天就重复做这些……
我只能做的只有这些……
唉~
不说了……
继续打机……sienz ing~
13.12.08
KL一日游[education fair again~]
回来了……
今天的KL一日游还蛮多收获的……
当然这也是我第一次在没有家人的陪同下，
只有两个朋友的陪伴到外地……
第一次搭巴士去KL……[以前都是有人坐车载的~]
第一次搭LRT/MRT……[是没搭过嘛~乡下来的~]
还有很多……
回来后很多人都问……
“好玩吗？”
………………
我们像是去玩的吗？
是去看education fair好不好？
我们很乖的……[虽然是有玩的心态啦~但是我们也有认真的拿资料的~]
也遇到很多不同的人……
那间很积极的学院……
我会记得他们……
很搞笑……
不同的人，问了我们整5-6次……
sienz~
填了无数的survey，我们终于顶不顺了……
走人……
去了PWTC的fair还有时间，
就去去TARC的open day咯~
路途遥远……
要转车……
我是没搭过LRT，但也不用一天给我搭那么多次的……
不过system蛮好的……很快就到了……
不过………………
天不作美啊~
下雨wor~就雨中跑步咯……
终于去到那里…………
但样子狼狈到~~=.=
有点后悔去到那里……
因为没东西看的……
再sienz~
因为下大雨……
我们就“博大雾”搭别人college的巴士咯~
上到巴士才看到好像每个人手上都有票……
我们就担心了起来……[怕lak se啊~]
幸好有一对情侣和我们也一样……
我们就跟着他们看怎样咯……
还好“博大雾”成功！xp
回去前，吃餐MCD先~
医饱了肚，才踏上回家的旅途……
车上，我们也想了很多……
在担心一些未来的事……
都是在决定要读form 6还是foundation好？
我不知道啊~~
去了这个fair又好像读foundation好一点……
但是要很多很多钱嘞~
拿scholarship？loan？半攻读？
我知道这条路不容易走……
但是我还会走下去的……
只要我还有坚强的意志……
要坚信自己……
有信念，才能成功！
后记：我到现在都好未能做好决定……一切都要等到成绩出来才能做最后的决定……结束了这个月的玩乐生活，我都应该找份工作了吧~再不做工，我会闷死……
今天的KL一日游还蛮多收获的……
当然这也是我第一次在没有家人的陪同下，
只有两个朋友的陪伴到外地……
第一次搭巴士去KL……[以前都是有人坐车载的~]
第一次搭LRT/MRT……[是没搭过嘛~乡下来的~]
还有很多……
回来后很多人都问……
“好玩吗？”
………………
我们像是去玩的吗？
是去看education fair好不好？
我们很乖的……[虽然是有玩的心态啦~但是我们也有认真的拿资料的~]
也遇到很多不同的人……
那间很积极的学院……
我会记得他们……
很搞笑……
不同的人，问了我们整5-6次……
sienz~
填了无数的survey，我们终于顶不顺了……
走人……
去了PWTC的fair还有时间，
就去去TARC的open day咯~
路途遥远……
要转车……
我是没搭过LRT，但也不用一天给我搭那么多次的……
不过system蛮好的……很快就到了……
不过………………
天不作美啊~
下雨wor~就雨中跑步咯……
终于去到那里…………
但样子狼狈到~~=.=
有点后悔去到那里……
因为没东西看的……
再sienz~
因为下大雨……
我们就“博大雾”搭别人college的巴士咯~
上到巴士才看到好像每个人手上都有票……
我们就担心了起来……[怕lak se啊~]
幸好有一对情侣和我们也一样……
我们就跟着他们看怎样咯……
还好“博大雾”成功！xp
回去前，吃餐MCD先~
医饱了肚，才踏上回家的旅途……
车上，我们也想了很多……
在担心一些未来的事……
都是在决定要读form 6还是foundation好？
我不知道啊~~
去了这个fair又好像读foundation好一点……
但是要很多很多钱嘞~
拿scholarship？loan？半攻读？
我知道这条路不容易走……
但是我还会走下去的……
只要我还有坚强的意志……
要坚信自己……
有信念，才能成功！
后记：我到现在都好未能做好决定……一切都要等到成绩出来才能做最后的决定……结束了这个月的玩乐生活，我都应该找份工作了吧~再不做工，我会闷死……
5.12.08
突然觉得无言……
原本一整天的好心情，
竟然会为了一件事而搞到自己不开心……
===========早上===========
有和阿苏那班死党吃了一餐很贵下的早餐……
就去附近的tesco逛逛咯~
玩了一下那些挺幼稚的游戏机就回家了……
一回到家，就帮妈妈做工了……
===========中午===========
原本她们约了去佩仪家玩的……
可是我没人载~[惨~~T.T]
我也决定不去就算了……
不久阿包就打来说载我……
有人载喔~当然去啦~
丢下工作就走了……
玩到差不多六点就回家了……
===========晚上============
大伙又到了我家‘开抬’了~^^
原本开始的时候还玩得很开心的……
可是到最后，大家开始down了……
不知道为什么……
就开始为自己的事情烦了起来……
我是一个很容易被人感染的人……
看到他们这样，我自己也好像很down的样子……[但还要装开心~]
真的很想做些什么帮到他们……
说回那件令我不开心的事就是KL的trip……
之前说好去的朋友不去了……
完全是被人放飞机……
其实我也是被人放惯的了……
可是还是有点不爽而已……
但是他们却有千万个理由推你……
而你又没办法把他们的理由推翻……
就眼睁睁的对他们说没关系咯~
除了没关系，你还能说些什么啊？
作为朋友的，互相体谅是应该的……[他们有太多苦衷了，我也不好意思怪他们~]
但自己往往是体谅别人的那个，其实也不好受……
唉~~没关系啊~没关系啊~
要我说多几次没关系也无所谓……
因为我早已习惯了……
算了……
还是早点睡吧~
能不能去得到？
我不知道~
去到当然最好啦~
去不到就down一天就没事了吧~[应该会吧？不希望自己那样……]
竟然会为了一件事而搞到自己不开心……
===========早上===========
有和阿苏那班死党吃了一餐很贵下的早餐……
就去附近的tesco逛逛咯~
玩了一下那些挺幼稚的游戏机就回家了……
一回到家，就帮妈妈做工了……
===========中午===========
原本她们约了去佩仪家玩的……
可是我没人载~[惨~~T.T]
我也决定不去就算了……
不久阿包就打来说载我……
有人载喔~当然去啦~
丢下工作就走了……
玩到差不多六点就回家了……
===========晚上============
大伙又到了我家‘开抬’了~^^
原本开始的时候还玩得很开心的……
可是到最后，大家开始down了……
不知道为什么……
就开始为自己的事情烦了起来……
我是一个很容易被人感染的人……
看到他们这样，我自己也好像很down的样子……[但还要装开心~]
真的很想做些什么帮到他们……
说回那件令我不开心的事就是KL的trip……
之前说好去的朋友不去了……
完全是被人放飞机……
其实我也是被人放惯的了……
可是还是有点不爽而已……
但是他们却有千万个理由推你……
而你又没办法把他们的理由推翻……
就眼睁睁的对他们说没关系咯~
除了没关系，你还能说些什么啊？
作为朋友的，互相体谅是应该的……[他们有太多苦衷了，我也不好意思怪他们~]
但自己往往是体谅别人的那个，其实也不好受……
唉~~没关系啊~没关系啊~
要我说多几次没关系也无所谓……
因为我早已习惯了……
算了……
还是早点睡吧~
能不能去得到？
我不知道~
去到当然最好啦~
去不到就down一天就没事了吧~[应该会吧？不希望自己那样……]
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